In anticipation of the last update to The
House dropping in the third week of June, I've decided to create a
little "Best Of" update. It's Monday, I don't have a final until
Thursday, so I thought it would be entertaining to dip, knock back a
few, and be creative to enjoy the afternoon.
The House started in my senior year of high
school. Here's our first annual ski trip (well until this year)
to Emmett's cabin. This picture is one of my favorites of all
time because it harks back to times of old when I was a carefree little
asshole and had little to worry about besides hanging with some
crackers, BBQ'in and drinking Bud Light.
Had to include a picture of Melissa up in here because back then I was quite taken with her.
The first ski trip was so much fucking fun I don't even know...
Can't forget them anal beads and when Loughran and Dealtry still called SHP home.
It was good times when Doug still let us hang out at his house and ogle his sister.
SHIT. It's amazing I made the MA yearbook when
I didn't even go to the school. Oh well I hung out with enough
folk that I am an honorary member. Would that diploma be more
valuable than my SHP one?
My alter ego "Heidi," created in the 2000 and still used five years later in the 2005.
11/25/2000. The poisons I consumed this (fun at the time) night gave me my first extremely bad hangover.
The O6... when Brownlee gets back from England and
mobbing clubs with Ali G, we should go to the Hanky Panky. And
then perhaps the Turquoise Love Shack after. What were they
thinking repainting that sad old men's den a different color?
I drank every single night until we got caught
(through my website, nonetheless) for our little pony kegger in
October. Ain't that a B. Actually, that probably tacked on
years to my life.
That's cute.
We should've realized then that Stricker would become a legend in Campisi.
My first day party. I won't lie, I was pretty excited that I got to drink during the day in a socially acceptable setting.
Those of you who knew me freshman year may remember
how huge of a bitch I was. I almost never ate at the cafeteria,
and would go home in the morning (about an hour drive round trip) to
shower. Every day. And I was flying daily, so I would drive
back up in the afternoon. Chevron loves me. What the hell
was I thinking?
Fuck how much time did we spend up in Book and Stricker's room?
2002 Olympics and one of the many times I would go to visit Nick in the SLC.
I fucking love the SLC. People who don't know
always say how lame it is because of the Mormons, but they are too
ignorant to realize there are the Mormons who drink and sniff coke, and
then the people who won't be saved have to party that much harder to
make up for their religious brethren. So it all works out.
Fuck I was such a cute kid. WHAT HAPPENED?
My 19th birthday party at Miyake's with the extended VDT.
My odd number birthdays have been fantastic.
That's pretty much how I felt all day and night: overwhelmed with the amount of booze I was forced to drink.
HAHA James got arrested and went to jail. We thought it'd be Stricker for sure.
Last night that the extended VDT would ever be together. Damn.
You pussies like this beer tower I made? That
was from less than one quarter of drinking. All me. Wait...
should I be proud of that?
And so it begins, the quest to take a picture where we both look HBMS worthy.
The first of the 3 years (or was it just two?) that us MP folk went up to the city for New Year's.
Even as a guest, my selfish ass passed out on Emmett's bed before anyone got home. Smooth move.
Because of all the time I spent in Jake/Stricker/Conor's apartment, I felt this was necessary.
I tried weed for the first and last time, and got so
paranoid I thought I was Jesus Christ and I was going to be
crucified. And then I sobbed a bit.
HAHAHA if only you motherfuckers knew.
We did Vegas. I lost a lot of money. Oh
well at least some bitch bought us Cristal, Jack and Bud Lights in a
Bellagio suite. I guess we're hot. That's hot.
What? Drinking in Doug's cabana? No...
And so begins my problems handling liquor...
Ted likes the bewbies.
Out of control, while E-Train and Burkholder watch my back.
My greatest physical achievement is when we walked to San Francisco. And took the long way by mistake, and so that sucked.
This shit was freshmen year in high school.
FUCK. I believe this was taken at CCS where we definitely placed
last for the 4x100. By the time I got the baton as anchor, many
of the teams were already done. Fuck that shit. Well at
least we dominated our league.
Hey! I'm off probation! Let's celebrate!
Burkholder leaves for Sweden...
Ice House: Version 1. Which version was your favorite?
The first of 12:01s: Charles Leone. Damn look at how small Huens was.
I've always been quite partial to this picture.
Yeah...
Creative, young padawan.
FUCK I loved my chef costume. That shit was off the fucking chain.
If you haven't noticed already, I'll admit it; I like taking pictures with good looking girls.
And I am infatuated with Lindsay.
That's hot. Real hot.
If only we could have one more year where none of us
have any sort of obligation but to drink at least a 12 pack every
night. That would be ideal.
Can you guess whose 12:01 it is?
THIS PICTURE WAS NOT STAGED. I walk up and see
Leland spooning the shit out of Bric. Does he like getting his
shit pushed in?
I've taken many great pictures of myself in the
mirror, however the back story behind this one is the greatest.
If you lived in Campisi you may know of my hatred of a certain Dyke,
and when she had the audacity to roll into our house to drink our beer,
I was not OK with that and kicked her ass out. Hmmmm, that sounds
bad; but it was quite the opposite.
You don't even begin to comprehend how awful the morning after was.
Since this was one of the perhaps six times I drank with Ted, I thought I'd put it up.
Ice House, Version 2. Wait a minute... I'm not in Ice House anymore.
Black/black/black is fucking SICK. The only way it could get better is if I was black.
This is probably it.
Lindsey/Lindsay Sandwich. Good times.
Probably the gayest picture I've ever been in. Which is surprising, I guess.
What the fuck is this asshole doing nowadays?
Salt Lake again, this time with Herr Cohen.
Lacey is the hotness I can't get over it.
Remember when we had Ice House Whores?
No explanation needed.
Dave Ray talked shit on the 911 Challenge, and it owned him.
As per that guy's bet with Ray, Ray didn't finish,
so we go to give him a mullet. If he won, it'd would've been a
$50. How much Schlitz does that buy you?
Fuck I miss playing Catch Phrase.
I've always thought that this was a superb picture of me, and when I saw it on some random website, I was flattered.
The first group where I've become friends with all the members.
We had a little modeling session this night.
That's how things should be.
No I wasn't trying to kiss Benton.
HAHA how many times did we bother Conor and his life partner to play the Phrase with us while eating Jack in the Box?
After Mel took us out to a fantastic dinner, it was a bad idea to go out in wet sand wearing nice clothing.
Do you have a concussion?
This was back when we used to chug with each other, constantly.
The day drinking tradition begins.
I got robbed by some fucking whore and stripper while we were in Vegas for Dallas' 21st birthday.
Here's me on my 21st birthday.
My 21st birthday party rocked faces off. I had lots of fun.
Details are still hazy, but I believe that this was the peak.
More "fuck yous" were dropped in this time period
than ever in my life. And considering the frequency that I swear,
that was a pretty admirable achievement.
The A*Teens pose.
And the real A*Teens. Damn what are you two hot, hot Swedes doing these days?
Our History 7 class was the best class (as in fun to be in) after English 2 where it was the VDT plus like 4 random nogs.
Good picture of Prickett.
I've known these fools since we were babies shitting ourselves.
So we're shit drunk at like 6am and I have to fly back to the U.S. at 12. Good going there Yasu.
Vegas, again. I lost money, again.
Wouldn't this update be incomplete without multiple pictures of Dave and Screbant?
Marinated.
I remember back in the day when I used to be able to win chugging challenges.
Our beer fight was great.
Everyone knows that.
YES2ME.
What happened?
You are a hot, hot little one.
My favorite picture in an update that was full of gems.
Everyone looks so happy to drink!
Loves it.
That's hot.
I want a smaller one.
Just a bad night in general. Fuck I missed my chance to pull a repeat last week.
And now, I lose all the time. Don't put an "L" on your forehead.
They're back from abroad!
Ice House, Version 3, Golden Master.
I wonder what your kids would look like.
Hot picture of the BLT Sandwich.
What the shit do you do now?
Helo thar.
This was right before Lizzie tied for 2nd place in Keg Laps during the OTR Beer Olympics... in HEELS.
Maybe you should cut an album with Paris Hilton.
Yup.
If Ferd wasn't such a fucking homo I think we could've beaten you BITCHES.
HAHA we cut their power and hot water so they had to shower together. That's hot.
Mer looked especially good today so I have to give props where they are due.
I passed out after 3 hours of drinking. This
always happens when I drink with Pat Kelly. Is he slipping
sedatives in my drink?
That's hot.
That's vain.
I threw up right after. Then I came back, and beat her. Good work I love you.
I won't lie when I read this I was secretly
delighted that I was finally getting some recognition for the hard work
I put into The House.
Any takers?
This was my first haircut from someone other than my mom in like 6 years.
Keep it real.
We ride bikes a lot now.
Yeah we know.
Flip Cup Dream Team right up in here.
Happy Birthday.
Probably will never go in Campisi again. That's sad.
Stricker in action.
You noble, noble creature.
Whenever I look at this picture I feel like the other 3 people have died in a train wreck or something.
Last caption.
So through all these years, Dr. Chiba, have you changed? Yeah
no. Still a stupid asshole. But you can see the changes in
others. kbye till next time.
June 6, 2005