Edward 40 Hands

The only thing that saddens me about this event was that it was not a Dr. Chiba original. I found this game while perusing the latest issue of FHM magazine. Obviously a play on the fine film Edward Scissorhands, this game is intense. By the way I saw that movie while I was in Alabama visiting one my ma's friends. Yes I know not many Japanese folk go to Alabama, but I have also traveled to Arkansas because that was my favorite state in 3rd grade. Think about it- the only diamond mine in the US, Bill Clinton's homestate (he even wrote me a letter when he was gov'na), it doesn't get any better. It was all sorts of fun, posting on barges and crystal mining. If you ever would like to go, you should contact me and I can be your personal concierge (for information anyway).

 

He is ridiculous. He has this 70" TV just pushed up against the wall taking up space when really he should donate it to the Y.M.F. the Yasu's Monetary Fund.

So this is how you play Edward 40 Hands. You duct tape 40's to your hands and drink them before taking a piss. The hard part about it is you cannot unzip yourself. An easy game when you're starting out drinking, but absolutely horrible when you've already had some drinks previously. On a side note, duct tape used to be called duck tape when the military used it to fix things, but when the general population got a hold of it they taped their ducts and such, and hence the word "duct" and not "duck." However I think the two are interchangeable.

Second hand...

I am so great. I am so great. You can call me Admiral Awesome!

Stephen and I posting in front of the gigantic HD projector screen.

Oh no it is the sisters. The one in blue standing next to Steve is Steve's sister Elizabeth K. Burkholder, Jr. And next to me is Doug's sister, Brenda. I don't know why she is trying to look so tough.

Now she smiles for the camera!

This is a picture of me after I was smelling Doug's knee because it smelled oh so good. Does this make sense to you- he showered before we came over. I don't know who he was trying to impress, however he did impress me!

This was absolutely horrible I needed to urinate so bad. Emmett took off my belt and pants, but it didn't help one bit.

One futile attempt- you try pulling down yo pants while having 40s taped to your hands.

Done done! I won't lie, I did dribble a bit, but I wrecked house on this game.

Hi there Ted, we love you. If anyone wants to challenge me to this game, bring it. And don't tell me it's already been brought cause you're a punk.

 

 

 June 17, 2003

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